Gentle Thoughts for the day...

JB's picture

Here are some funny quotes that my wife forwarded to me today. I have them posted on Brusco.org, but since i don't get alot of traffic there I figured i would post them here as well.

I hope that they bring a smile to your face as they did to mine.

Birds of a feather flock together and crap on your car.

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When I'm feeling down, I like to whistle. It makes the neighbor's dog run to the end of his chain and gag himself.

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If you can't be kind, at least have the decency to be vague.

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Don't assume malice for what stupidity can explain.

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A penny saved is a government oversight.

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The real art of conversation is not only to say the right thing at the right
time, but also to leave unsaid the wrong thing at the tempting moment.

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The older you get, the tougher it is to lose weight, because by then your
body and your fat have gotten to be really good friends.

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The easiest way to find something lost around the house is to buy a replacement.

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He who hesitates is probably right .

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Did you ever notice:

The Roman Numerals for forty (40) are " XL."

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If you think there is good in everybody, you haven't met everybody.

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If you can smile when things go wrong, you have someone in mind to blame.

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The sole purpose of a child's middle name is so he can tell when he's really in trouble.

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There's always a lot to be thankful for if you take time to look for it. For example I am sitting here thinking how nice it is that wrinkles don't hurt.

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Did you ever notice:

When you put the 2 words "The" and "IRS" together
it spells "Theirs."

Have a good Day,

JB

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matthew's picture

Excellent!

More quotes for my file! Do you have any attributions for any of these?

--
Matthew P. Barnson

--
Matthew P. Barnson

JB's picture

Unfortunately not...

I have heard of many of these, and some i entered in there myself... But none of them were "original" works by me.

JB

Teresa's picture

--I laughed at all of them.

--I laughed at all of them. I love to smile. Thanks.
Teresa the Flautist

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Teresa the Flautist and fire dancer