Author: matthew

Two old partly-deaf ladies walk out of church one Sunday. The first shouts to the second, “That sermon was so long, my foot fell asleep.”

“Your butt fell asleep?” replied the second. “That explains it, I heard it snoring.”

http://blogs.usatoday.com/popcandy/2007/11/exclusive-excer.html

Yep. Nathan Fillion speaks out about playing Captain Malcom Reynolds in Firefly. For those of us who own the DVDs and the movie, it’s fun readin’. You can hear his voice in the paragraphs.

OK, so I have had no fewer than seven failed registrations today from people with names who are variants on “have faith in god”. Here’s a hint, “have faith in god”… If you really want to post on my blog with religious messages, use a valid email address! Seriously, that’s all it takes. Use a valid return address, and you can post to your heart’s content. As long as your comments follow board guidelines, I’ll let them stand. This, of course, means “no advertising”, so if you post the same message with twenty-six spammish links to a web site, I’ll kill it along with the “vi8gra ci4lis enl4rge ipso facto annuit coeptis novus ordo fellatio” posts I have to prune on a regular basis.

One would think that, if “have faith in god” was a pious chap, he’d avoid the appearance of evil by using a fake email address. I mean, isn’t lying a sin? Or, if he valued his pseudonymity, he could always post anonymously here, following the clear instructions and looking at the little picture to ensure he’s not an automated script of some sort.

Heck, some Chinese spammers have figured this out, and apparently hired laborers at $0.25 a day to submit spammish comments. The least you can do is register a throw-away account, post your troll, and then never check that free-mail account again. That’s what everybody else does.

“The one thing I’m trying to get across is that I’m sympathetic to people caught up in religion. If you’re in a religion, it’s a reasonable thing to continue to believe. In Salt Lake City, you cannot not have an opinion about God. It’s like you’re living in Iraq. You must know what side you’re on because it’s everywhere.” –Julia Sweeney, better known as “Pat” from Saturday Night Live

Sweeney performed Saturday night in Park City. I’m sorry I missed it.

http://www.sltrib.com/ci_7593874

For those who missed Season 1, I bring you Mr. Deity, Season 2. They are on www.crackle.com now, which I don’t necessarily think was a great move, but still top-notch writing and very, very funny shorts.

The episodes are only 3-5 minutes long, and come out every two weeks. If you are someone who can be lighthearted about religion, I think you’ll find it tremendously funny.

The YouTube collection of Season 1 episodes The RSS Feed for Season 2, including several Season 1 episodes

The Crackle.com move, unfortunately, seemed to make it a little bit tougher to catch up on the back episodes… alas. Anyway, enjoy!

So my little state once again made national news, this time due to a cop tasering a fellow who wasn’t fast enough following instructions.

My feelings are mixed on this one. I think that in life there are very few absolutes. The miscommunications were apparent to me on first watching:

1. The cop messed up by not stating the cause for arrest clearly. He should have stated the speed the fellow was going, and the marked speed on the road at that point.
2. The fellow refused to sign the ticket. Technically, the moment you are pulled over you are under arrest. Signing a ticket is not an admission of guilt, it’s a promise to appear in court to defend yourself against the charges or pay a fine in lieu of appearance. Only your promise to appear will allow you to be released from arrest; without a promise to appear, they have to hold you until your court date. In some states, they can write “refused to sign” on the ticket instead.
3. The cop’s instructions were unclear. He should have instructed the fellow that he was going to jail for refusing to sign the ticket when he asked him to step out of the vehicle.
4. The fellow misunderstood. He thought the cop was asking him to step out of the vehicle to show him the signs he was talking about; the cop was telling him to step out of the vehicle in order to restrain him and force him into compliance.
5. The fellow began walking away and put his hands in his pockets. Oops. To a cop, this means one of two things: you intend to flee, or you intend to pull out a gun and shoot him.
6. The cop did not inform the fellow of his intent to taser him if he did not comply. While the fear of a concealed weapon might justify his behavior, he was too fast on the trigger finger.
7. The cop lied to his fellow cop about what happened. Being caught lying on tape is a big no-no.

I don’t know how it will play out in court, but I do know a little bit better now what not to do in the taser-happy US of A.

So, it’s Black Friday. What great deals did you find in your pre-dawn shopping?

I was sent these questions by a foreign co-worker; I thought reproducing them would be a reasonable way to talk about Thanksgiving this year!

On (2007/11/21 10:23), Manush Thranivaniranjanian wrote: > 1. What is the significance of the Thanksgiving Day? > (answer in one or two sentences only)

Thanksgiving is a traditional Autumn harvest celebration first celebrated by colonists of the New World in 1621, and continued in various forms until it became a federal holiday in 1941.

> 2. Why it always falls on a Thursday in November?

Historically, it occurred after the last day of the Autumn harvest of crops (usually late October or early November). Franklin D. Roosevelt set the date for the national celebration in 1939.

> 3. Why Turkey is the main item on a Thanksgiving Day dinner table?

A turkey is much larger than a chicken, duck, or goose, and feeds many more people. It was also supposedly served at the first American Thanksgiving dinner, as recorded by William Bradford in 1643 in a manuscript lost until just before the start of the Civil War. Because of this, President Abraham Lincoln had turkeys sent to soldiers for Thanksgiving during the American Civil War (1861-1865), and the tradition stuck.

Turkeys are also a native American species, and several traditional Thanksgiving dishes like corn on the cob, pumpkin pie, and American cranberries are made from foods which only existed in America prior to the sixteenth century.

> 4. When did the custom of Presidential pardon of the Turkey started?

Nobody knows for sure; it is rumored that Harry Truman started the tradition in 1947, while others maintain it was Abraham Lincoln who started it by issuing the pardon to his son’s pet turkey.

> 5. Which state in the USA has the largest number of Turkeys?

Why on earth would I know that? 🙂

Regards, — Matthew P. Barnson | UNIX System Administrator | – – – – Thought for the moment: There is only one way to console a widow. But remember the risk. — Robert Heinlein

As many of you know, the first of the “His Dark Materials” trilogy has been filmed and is being released on December 7, 2007. The Golden Compass is not even released yet, and is already causing a furor, sufficient to warrant an entry regarding the religious leanings of its author on snopes.com:

Claim: The 2007 film The Golden Compass is based on a series of books with anti-religious themes. Status: True.

There will be a new Children’s movie out in December called THE GOLDEN COMPASS. It is written by Phillip Pullman, a proud athiest who belongs to secular humanist societies. He hates C. S. Lewis’s Chronical’s of Narnia and has written a trilogy to show the other side. The movie has been dumbed down to fool kids and their parents in the hope that they will buy his trilogy where in the end the children kill God and everyone can do as they please. Nicole Kidman stars in the movie so it will probably be advertised a lot. This is just a friendly warning that you sure won’t hear on the regular TV.

Now, on the one hand, I understand the consternation of some parents. My sister-in-law, for instance, mentioned her distaste for the series. She really liked the first book, mentioning that Pullman built a wonderful world and populated it with really interesting characters. The second book she thought was good, but not as good, but the strong anti-religious overtones of the third book turned her off. She still liked the series as a whole, and recommended it, but wished the third book had turned out differently.

On the other hand, I read the trilogy myself, and loved it. I found the first book a fun introduction to the series, but fairly forgettable. The second book made the story more interesting, and the profound implications of the third book made it a fantastic joyride through parallel universes and the complications of competing worldviews.

“…in the end the children kill God and everyone can do as the please.”

Well, their description of the ending of the book is way off, but it sounds like a happy ending to me. The more children are exposed to new ideas and taught to think for themselves, making rational choices about their religion and personal lives, the better. Let’s camp out for tickets!

I no longer live in an area with much ammunition for this device, but this is just too funny (though a little bit cruel) for words:

The Squirrelpult.