Author: matthew

This morning I’m heading in for a follow-up interview. It’s for a contracting position through Smith Johnson with emWare, a seven-year “startup” that does software for embedded microcontrollers in devices such as vending machines.

The job’s a six-month contract. I don’t know whether it will go past that or not. Their lead admin is taking a several-month leave, and they need someone with Solaris and Linux skills, along with a little Java, Perl, and Bash, as well as systems automation experience. Enter… me! I seem to be a good fit, and as far as I know, I’m the only one being subject to a second interview. I hope all goes well.

I received a somewhat excited call from Bryan, the recruiter/contract lead for this position. He asked me to be “calm” for the interview, and to try to “tone down” my personality a bit. Apparently, one of my interviewers thought I was a little high-strung.

Me? High-strung? Combatative? NEVER, I have no idea what they are smoking thinking that 😉

Yeah, I am a little high-strung, all the time. If I’d gone for thirty years without figuring this out, I’d be in some serious denial. I consider it a positive attribute — let’s hope the interviewers feel the same. I told the recruiter “look, I’m not going to create a fake personality just for the interview when they’ll need to work with the real me for the next six months”. He agreed, but still asked me to work on being “calm and approachable” for this interview.

Where’s a Valium when you need one?

I’ll let you know how it goes.

My eight-year-old blonde-haired daughter stared up at me from the couch, a sullen look in her eyes, and a glower underneath her growing blonde eyebrows. Her dripping-wet hair from her shower was slowly soaking the shoulders of her nightdress, her chubby cheeks flushed pink in anger.

“But we didn’t even get to finish family night!” she shouted at me, false tears growing in the corner of her eyes.

“Done or not, it’s time for bed for you. You’ve delayed long enough, and now have two choices: you may get to bed on your own power, or under my power,” I replied. I’ve used that phrase enough times now that she’s familiar with it: it means that if she doesn’t choose to move as asked, she will be carried by me to where I’ve asked her to go. It’s a “Love and Logic” thing: present your children with two choices, and allow them to choose the least objectionable. We know that it’s manipulation, and the logical part of me screams ‘false dichotomy! false dichotomy!’, but it makes things proceed so much more smoothly, and helps maintain at least some pretense at discipline in our house.

She voiced a small, closed-mouthed scream, balled her hands up in fists, and glared at me. Her right foot inched forward. Her left foot inched forward. This was too slow. I’ve learned that, in dealing with my children, resistance, or slowness in performing that which is required, is the same as defiance. They simply try to push the limit as far as it will go. I’m no disciplinarian, but there are certain daily routines where I’ll provide the motivation if they fail to. I choose to see in black and white: she was not yet in her room, so she had obviously chosen to have me propel her there.

I set down my laptop, lowered the recliner footrest, and stood up. I generally do not spank my children (except in cases of violation of certain critical instructions that may be life-saving, such as come, go, sit, no, and stay, or if they lie to me), so rather than cower in fear at some sort of retribution, she began to fight back with words. “I’m going, Dad, I’m going!” she said, as she picked up her pace slightly.

“Not fast enough, and in my book, that means you’re disobeying. It’s no problem, really” I said as I bent down, grabbed her around the knees, and hoisted her over my shoulder like a sack of potatoes, “you’re quite light”.

Hmm, saying she’s light was a lie. She’s 89 pounds now. She’s built like much of the rest of the family: pudgy, but solid rather than flabby. I grunted slightly with the effort. Who spanks me now when I tell a lie like that one, I wondered.

“No! No! I was going, I was going!” she squealed. But she didn’t sound sad, upset, or mad enough. I think she was actually enjoying being carried upstairs at some level. I realized it had been a very, very long time since I’d carried her upstairs.

Just then, I felt a spank on my rearend.

I pondered for the briefest of moments — should I respond with anger, humor, or not at all? Humor comes much more naturally to me than anger. “Come on, you can do better than that!” I reassured her. “That spank didn’t hurt at all! I know you’re mad at me, so hit me like you mean it.”

I felt another smack, this one harder.

“That’s more like it. Now I know you’re angry; that one even stung a little.”

Smack. I chuckled.

Smack. I laughed harder at her efforts.

SmackSmackSmackSmackSmackSmackSmackSmackSmack… a veritable flurry of open-palmed hits landed on my backside. I was surprised at the strength of the little girl over my shoulder — I wouldn’t think she’d have the leverage to deliver such stinging impacts. The flailing ceased as I leaned over and set her down.

“Well, at least you let me have it for carrying you upstairs in such an undignified manner,” I said, as I winked at her and chuckled again. “Those were some pretty hard smacks!”

“I didn’t!” she responded, with half a grin fighting with the mad expression she was trying to muster.

“I did!” a little voice sprang up from behind my trousers. I turned, and there stood little Zachariah, holding up both palms bright red from the blows, a grin crooking the corner of his mouth, eyebrows raised high in self-satisfaction.

Here it is: final proof that using Powerpoint turns you stupid.

I’m a long-term anti-fan of “presentation software” — I’ve often thought that, while it’s a decent organizational tool for helping one structure a presentation, I nearly always need to present more information than can possibly be present on the slides.

For a reasonable technical presentation, a tool like Powerpoint can be useful to highlight the most important data from the technical writeup, but nothing can substitute for the actual data, information-dense charts, and good technical explanation. Not even “gee whiz” stuff like embedding video into the presentation can improve it enough to be an adequate substitute for presenting information in a well-documented, scholarly, written fashion when need requires.

Slides are useful to present dumbed-down information, but when it comes to any complex topic, I’ll take the manual, please.

Then again, they are great when you really don’t have much to work with anyway, but you want to look like you do. Like sales presentations.

I created this response on the alt.suport.diet.low-carb newsgroup. And when I type this much, I’d rather it not be lost to antiquity, you know? Plus, my ISP seems to have been losing posts to newsgroups lately. So I’m archiving it on my blog. A guy who calls himself “Peter” has this to say:

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I’ve read the Atkins book and I’m on the fourth day of induction, feeling pretty awful and feeling especially sick at even the thought of another [expletive] egg! But the ‘Ketostix’ are showing deep purple (highest level on the scale) so I’m doing something right.

I’m eating as much as before; arguably even more, because nothing seems to satisfy my craving for carbohydrate of some kind. The result is that I’m raiding the fridge hourly in an effort to find something, anything that might make me feel better. Consequently, my food intake has gone through the roof.

Perhaps I haven’t understood the principles of the Atkins diet but I’m puzzled about something.Where does all that dietary fat (and protein) go. Does it just get excreted? If it doesn’t get excreted then it presumably gets burnt for energy? But if that happens doesn’t it mean that every gram of dietary fat I eat is one less gram of body fat that gets burnt? So I lose weight less quickly? And so, conversely (if my logic is right so far) if I eat more fat than my body can burn then won’t I just put weight on?

And if all that’s true then isn’t it the case that the Atkins Diet cliche that “you can eat as much non carb food as you like” just garbage? The cynic in me might even say that the reason most people loose weight on Atkins is down to the fact that the ‘allowed foods’ are so awful that they eat less anyway? So in my case I would have to cut down on my protein/fat intake if Atkins is to succeed? And if I do that then what’s the advantage of Atkins over any other calorie restrictive diet?

Obviously there’s a flaw in my logic……………..but what it it?

Peter

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My Response:

Here are some answers, Peter. Realize I’m just a low-carber that’s read a lot, and I could be totally wrong on a thing or two, but I *think* I’m right.

1. “… the ‘Ketostix’ are showing deep purple”

   The Ketostix showing “purple” means you’re processing dietary (and probably body) fat for energy. Good. However, the really deep color is far more an indication that you aren’t drinking enough water than that you’re “deeply in ketosis”. As long as the sticks are any color other than their original neutral beige, you can be sure you’re in ketosis/lipolysis. Drink more water to lighten them up.

2. “I’m eating as much as before; arguably even more, because nothing seems to satisfy my craving for carbohydrate of some kind. The result is that I’m raiding the fridge hourly in an effort to find something, anything that might make me feel better. Consequently, my food intake has gone through the roof.”

   What are you eating? Have you tried following the Atkins induction menu strictly for a week? Normally, after 3-5 days, most people lose the carb cravings, and within the two weeks, encounter far less hunger as well as a substantial energy boost. You may want to double-check what you’re eating to make sure that everything is on the “induction” list.

   I felt like I was eating more than before when I went on induction. After a week, I discovered Fitday and started tracking, then realized that I actually wasn’t eating nearly enough. Just a few days of tracking your usual eating habits is often enough to give you a clue of how much you should be eating to satisfy dietary requirements.

3. “Where does all that dietary fat (and protein) go. Does it just get excreted?”

   Yep. Ketones that show up in your urine are similar to carbs — they sport 4 calories per gram. If you’re eating your daily requirement of calories to (normally) not lose any weight, and you are on a low-carb diet, you’ll still lose weight roughly equal (over time), at 3500kcals/pound, to what you’re pissing into your toilet.

   Your body dumps those ketones into your urine because they are acidic, and it’s trying to maintain the pH level of your bloodstream. Yet it needs more energy, so your fat cells and the fat you digest are creating more ketones. It’s kind of like a nuclear reactor, in a way — reactors have to dump some hot water *somewhere* in order to keep temperatures equalized. Often this is to a massive pond where the environment can cool it off before it’s re-used. Your body is doing a similar thing, but it’s trying to maintain acid/base balance, rather than heat.

4. “every gram of dietary fat I eat is one less gram of body fat that gets burnt?”

   If you don’t eat enough calories to satisfy your Basal Metabolic Rate, eventually your body slows your metabolism to compensate. It’s a survival mechanism. So you need to make sure to eat enough food to be satisfied, yet not enough to be stuffed silly.

5. “if I eat more fat than my body can burn then won’t I just put weight on?”

   Yes and no. If you’re in ketosis/lipolysis, you have some “burn-off” of calories through your urine, so you can eat a bit more calories than you normally could and still maintain weight. However, pronounced evidence of this effect is generally short-lived for the first few weeks or months on a low-carb diet, and by the time you move from Ongoing Weight Loss to Pre-Maintenance, it’s virtually nonexistent. For most people, they will lose visible evidence of ketones somewhere between 40-60 grams of carbs per day. You’re not eating like Induction forever, you know. But the metabolic advantage that sticks with you is that a higher protein diet metabolizes in the liver at only 58% percent efficiency versus carbohydrates, and you’ll tend to feel more satiated when low-carbing vs. low-fatting.

6. “…Atkins Diet cliche that “you can eat as much non carb food as you like””

   Sounds like you didn’t really read the book. That’s a fallacy. You can eat as much as you need to be satisfied — but not stuffed. This also varies according to height. Short people often find they need to reduce portion sizes and accomodate their bodies to less food, even on Atkins. I’ve found that, even at six feet tall, I need to occasionally monitor my calories per day to make sure I’m meeting my Basal Metabolic Rate (to avoid the “famine mode” of metabolism), and to gauge how well I’m meeting my body’s requirements as I continue to drop weight. It’s a bit of a science project, really.

   The relevant Atkins philosophy is “if you are hungry, eat.” But, when eating, avoid the carbohydrate foods, and track the carbs of what you eat according to your current phase of the eating plan. This philosophy is not quite the same as “eat as much non carb food as you like”. If you’re not hungry, even if you’d “like” more, don’t eat. There’s still self-discipline involved on Atkins — it’s just considerably easier to maintain this way of eating than most low-fat or traditional calorie-restricted plans.

7. “The cynic in me might even say that the reason most people loose weight on Atkins is down to the fact that the ‘allowed foods’ are so awful that they eat less anyway?”

   I have no idea what you’re talking about. I just enjoyed a fantastic salad. Two cups of lettuce. Three tablespoons of pine nuts (I just like pine nuts — you may like other nuts). A handful of real bacon bits. And it was all topped with sauteed chicken breast that I made myself. A few nights ago I went to Carl’s Junior and ordered a Western Bacon Double Cheeseburger without the bun. It was excellent, and presented in an appealing way on a platter. I had to eat it with a fork and knife, but no worries. Last night I had an Atkins Endulge ice cream bar. I’ve been off the carbs long enough that that is “sweet enough” for me, though some people don’t like them.

   The food I get to eat, particularly now that I’m past Induction, are just awesome. Hamburgers (hold the bun). Low-cab pancakes, if I wish to make them. Cauliflower salad that I like better than potato salad. Creamy cheesecakes. Taco salads (sans the chips). Fantastically creamy, flavorful homemade soups. Alaskan King Crab, and other shellfish. Shrimp stir-fry. There’s a whole world of cooking I’m exploring now, after three years as a partial vegetarian (one year ovo-lacto, two years ovo-lacto, fish and fowl). It’s some great stuff.

8. “… So in my case I would have to cut down on my protein/fat intake if Atkins is to succeed? And if I do that then what’s the advantage of Atkins over any other calorie restrictive diet? “

   A low-carbohydrate, low-protein diet is a recipe for a heart attack, as your body pillages your body’s muscles (eventually, including heart muscle) to sustain your life. A low-carbohydrate, low-fat diet is very difficult to maintain, since you’ll feel both carbohydrate deprived, and starved for any satisfying foods. Some people are more weight-loss intolerant than others, and it’s important to make sure you’re following the plan exactly (including prohibited foods), as well as, in some cases, monitoring your caloric intake and making sure you’re receiving sufficient nutrition through supplements, vegetables, and the fats & proteins in your diet throughout the Induction phase.

   The carb cravings normally go away after a few days on Induction. If they don’t, you are almost certainly eating something off-plan. Try following the strict Induction menu provided in Dr. Atkins New Diet Revolution for at least one week. Re-read Chapter 11 (I think it is) to remember the Rules of Induction.

   And remember that Induction lasts somewhere between two weeks and several months — how long beyond two weeks, if you choose, is up to you, keeping in mind that one of the most common causes of “stalls” in weight loss while on Atkins is staying below 20 carbs a day. People tend to lose more weight, and keep it off, if they transition from Induction, to Ongoing Weight Loss, to Pre-Maintenance, to Maintenance, than to Induct as long as they possibly can. If you stay on Induction much beyond six months (if you have a lot to lose), your body begins hoarding all the calories and fat it can in an effort to keep you alive with such a long-sustained low-carb regimen. You MUST increase your number of carbs (if you are of sufficient height that 20 carbs is too little for you) in order to be “doing Atkins”. It’s controlled-carb, not “no-carb”. I expect I’ll be eating somewhere around 100 carbs a day by the time I arrive at maintenance, which is only 1/3 of the U.S. RDA.

   The goal of Induction is to break your carbohydrate cravings and binging tendencies, plus set a baseline carbohydrate level for you at which you can prove to yourself the diet works; it sure sounds like you need it. It’s not a lifetime sentence on how to eat. I’m up to 35 carbs per day now, and still dropping weight rapidly (six-footer, 30 years old, nightly treadmill, exercise videos, or resistance training for 30-45 minutes). In the Ongoing Weight Loss Phase, you get to start experimenting with new foods, a little at a time, and it’s much more exciting.

As far as for the benefit versus a reduced-calorie diet: in the long term, the advantages as I see them are:

• Atkins makes people feel more satisfied with what they eat than low-fat plans. It’s an easy plan to stick to once you’ve broken your cravings, and the negative effect many people feel when they “over-carb” helps keep them on-plan when they do slip off. I don’t know what the statistics are like for people sticking to Atkins, but I’m finding it extraordinarily easy to make common-sense choices to keep my carb count down.
  Contrary to what some people think, eating low-carb cannot “make you diabetic”. It makes you more sensitive to the aftereffects when you over-carb, because it adjusts to a lower-carb regimen, but you’ll secrete insulin to handle it all the same. It’s just that eating excessive carbs with a high glycemic index will eventually make you feel kind of bloated, gassy, and tired.
• It stabilizes blood sugar for Type II diabetics and pre-diabetics much better than low-fat. Most morbidly obese people are pre-diabetic, many of the obese, and some of the overweight.
• Atkins offers more food choices. The only “forbidden” foods (post-Induction) are starchy or refined carbs like bread, potatoes, and white rice. This accounts for way, way too much grocery store shelf space, but on Atkins I eat much more healthy food. Wholesome grains, vegetables, meats, butter, dark turkey meat… “real food” rather than “low fat” stuff.

In the short-term (less than a year), those on a low-carbohydrate regimen drop fat weight much faster than those on low-fat, given equal calories, and maintain their existing lean muscle mass better.

It’s up to you — if you hate doing Atkins after the first two weeks, try something else. Some people like or need it, some don’t. That’s my lengthy two cents.

—
Matthew
Started Atkins@240lbs, Nov 1 2003

255/227/180 6’0″

Jean size:
40/36 (loose now!)/32

My wife and I celebrated nine years tonight. It’s been a long, hard road at times, but despite difficulties, changes, children, and challenge, there have been rewards aplenty to keep us happy and motivated.

I love you, Christy, with all my heart, more than anything else in my life. For now and always. — Matthew

Barry Smith has begun a series of articles reviewing various GNU/Linux distributions with a focus on the non-guru, non-clueless-newbie audience.

For the majority of computer users, that’s really where they fall, I think. Most know how to use the specific applications they rely on, and they understand where to find files, how to navigate the filesystem, and the difference between saving and running an application.

I take my buddy Justin Timpane as an example. For a while, he seemed to aspire to be a computer geek, then decided that it wasn’t for him and he’d rather do something more real, and more important, than fix computers for a living. These days, he’s both a nurse and an actor — a tall order to fill — and seems to be thriving, enjoying both, although he’s a lot more tired all the time than I remember him 🙂

Anyway, Justin knows how to turn his computer on.

I kid you not, there are people behind a screen every day who do not know this.

There was one lady at my former work (a bank) who had not turned her machine off for several years while working there. She was also one of our “frequent callers” on the helpline because she was so absolutely clueless. This appeared to be a problem endemic to her brain, rather than limited to the technical arena, since people complained about similar problems with her outside of IT.

Anyway, the bank instituted a “save power, turn it off” program (that also had a beneficial secondary effect of helping the IT dep’t roll out patches better) who called the helpdesk in absolute panic the day after we implemented this policy because her machine “wouldn’t turn on”. I went down to see what was the matter.

I saw that her PC tower was turned around backwards under her desk. Cables had obviously been pulled out and put back. The keyboard and mouse were plugged into the wrong jacks (they look identical in shape if you use a PS/2 mouse & keyboard, but you’d think the color-coding mismatch would tip people off).

I fixed the keyboard and mouse mixup. I made sure the cables were secure. I flipped the computer right-way-front again.

I pressed the power switch on the front of the PC.

“So that’s how you do it,” I heard in a murmer from her lips behind me.

Back to what I was saying. Justin knows where the power switch is. He knows his music recording application, Cakewalk Sonar, very well, and even gives me tips from time to time on how to use it. He uses Instant Messaging, email, and most of the web goodies. He knows how to use the pointy end of a screwdriver, is pretty smart, and has reinstalled operating systems. He’s an intelligent, competent, mainstream PC user who knows how to solve problems in general, and can figure out most technical problems he encounters. This, I consider the “mainstream, average PC user”, representing the middle 50% of PC users.

This kind of article is geared for people like him, without aspirations to guru-hood, who use computers as part of their day-to-day life and might be looking for an alternative to Microsoft Windows.

This first installment in the series focusses on the easy-to-use Windows competitor, LindowsOS. I thought it was pretty cool, and will cover the next installment when it comes out.

EDIT: I’ve been to Subway and tried their low-carb wraps. They are really quite good. Five of the eight carbs in the Turkey Bacon Wrap are from the wrap itself. While it’s not appropriate for Induction (you’re trying to break the carb addiction, after all), it’s a nice treat. You can convert any sandwich into a wrap now for an extra $0.50, and from what I understand, in a couple of months Subway is introducing low-carb salads to complement their offerings. Watch this space!

January 1 is often a time of quiet contemplation, reflection, and consideration of times past. Many of us sit down with a sheet of paper, a pencil, and perhaps our partners, and figure out what our goals for this year are going to be. Most often, it really doesn’t matter if we achieve these goals (and heck, how many of us actually keep them anyway?) but simply that we set them, and that we aspire to be better than we are.

What a noble tradition. However, this January 1, for me, isn’t about goal-setting, except for one: to go out and stuff myself silly on a Subway low-carb sandwich wrap!

Yep, Subway Sandwiches has jumped on the low-carb bandwagon. They are coming out with whole-weat sandwich wraps. The wraps have 5 carbs — add to that the sandwich meats and veggies, and you’re talking about a big sandwich that will probably come in under 10 carbs for most people. While not ideal for those on Atkins Induction (less than 20 carbs a day — blowing half the wad on one meal is not recommended), any time past the first two weeks, this might be a pretty good treat, or even a staple.

So, while I’m not saying “Forget the Jared Diet” (eat less and exercise while eating Subway sandwiches daily), this may cast an entirely new light on Jared’s diet for those trying to speed up their weight-loss or manage diabetes by reducing carbohydrate intake.

In related news, I bought a Carl’s Jr. Western Double Bacon Cheeseburger the other day. And I asked them to “hold the bun”. They presented the sandwich very attractively, with ketchup, mustard, and mayonnaise on the side, all on a nice foam dinner platter with a plastic lid. The bacon slices were criss-crossed in an “X” on top of this bun-less double cheeseburger.

I was so freaking impressed I called the Carl’s Jr. number right then and there (1.877.799.STAR) to congratulate them. Other than waiting on hold fifteen minutes while my kids played in the play area, it was cool. It went something like this (though I can’t remember the exact wording):

“Thank you for calling the Carl’s Junior customer service line. I’m Judy; may I have your name please?”

“Matthew P. Barnson”

“Matthew, what can we do for you today?”

“Well, I was just calling to congratulate you guys on a job well done. I ordered a Western Bacon Double Cheeseburger tonight without the bun. The last time I ordered a hamburger without the bun, it was at McDonald’s, and they took a cheeseburger, threw on all the toppings, and wrapped it in paper. It was disgusting. This burger from you guys, though, it just rocked! I mean, the presentation was excellent, it looked attractive to eat, and they didn’t look at me weird or anything.”

“Sir, you mean you’re calling to thank us?”

“Yeah, that’s right. Just to say thanks for making keeping to my low-carb eating regime much easier and more attractive.”

“Umm… okay”

(there was a pause, clicking of the keyboard on the other end)

“So, erm, well,” (she’s obviously trying to read her script at this point and figure out how to respond) “I will be sure and notify the regional vice president and manager of the store about this probl… erm, compliment, and they will see to it that it’s resolved… erm, that they keep up the good work,” she finished lamely.

She asked me for some personal information (address, phone number, etc). I went ahead and gave them to her, and surprise of surprises, she told us we would soon have coupons for two free hamburgers arriving in the mail!

Anyway, that’s my rambling post for the day. Cheers.

I ran across an interesting utility in a post on kuro5hin.org. It’s called Instant Gratification. What it does is, if you’re running a weblog, and someone visits, you get sent an instant message to your IM client! This gives you the opportunity, if it’s a logged-in user or someone on a related weblog (like LiveJournal, Blogger, and others share user accounts among thousands of blogs — but I run Drupal, so it’s just among a few hundred and whether the user logs in is totally up to the user to decide, rather than involuntary) to actually send IM’s to your visitors to determine whether they liked what they saw, what improvements you could put in, etc.

I dig it, and I think I’m going to use it. Now to hack my HTML code to allow it!

There’s another cool utility on that page called Blog Change Bot What this little bot does is allow people to receive Instant Messenger notifications when a blog entry on your site is updated.

Now, I already track users IM addresses (once again, on a purely voluntary basis if they decide to provide them), so converting this to a Drupal module should not be a big deal. I think the two could provide some really useful little utilities to Jon’s, Paul’s, and my blogs. Those are the three I really check every day 🙂 It would be nice if I could avoid checking them at all, and just get an IM when they are updated so I can check them when that happens. I track them on my site cloud anyway, so I kind of get a delayed-reaction notification when they change. It would rock to be notified within moments if they change — that way I can log on, leave a comment, and even fire them off a Private Message while they are still online! Or do similar things when Justin or Sam leaves an entry up here at barnson.org.

Download TightVNC here if you want to remotely administer your computer from somewhere else. I dig it.

This blog is mostly for my father-in-law 🙂

I recently discovered a very interesting website called blogosphere.us. I discovered them by analyzing my referrer log. Apparently, their program reads some 150,000 blogs to discover what the current “buzz” is, and links to those trends and articles that are causing a stir across the blogging world.

Talk about your grassroots journalism, that’s pretty freaking cool.