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OK.. so maybe you legitimately don’t like ’em.. but more often than not I am hearing “oh, I never watched that because..” and this is my top 10 list.

In No particular Order:

1) STAR WARS EPISODE 3: What started me off, someone said, I saw the first 2 and never saw the third. His loss, since it is the best since Empire and really captures that old spirit, despite some real missteps.

2) STAR TREK: DEEP SPACE NINE: Based on TNG fans who tried the first season and a half and checked out before it got REALLY good.. becoming, in my opinion, the best trek ever.

3) LOST: For 2 reasons. Half the people who tell me its not their thing think its a reality TV show. The other half checked out in the terrible first 8 eps of season 3, and missed out on it getting AMAZINGLY good.

4) BUFFY THE VAMPIRE SLAYER: I was on this list. Was never gonna watch that WB crap, saw the flick, hated it, end of story. Whoops. The best show on TV, exceeded only maybe by…

5) ANGEL: See DS9. People didn’t dig the 1st season, so they checked out. It is a darker, richer show, and one that I fnd casual viewers like more. Season 5 is a MUST SEE.

6) TERMINATOR: THE SARAH CONNOR CHRONICLES: Just the idea turned people off.. it seemed like a dumb ripoff.. it would be so easy to be bad. Its not. Its very good, and I look forward to it every week.

7) ARMY OF DARKNESS: Evil Dead 3. Looks like your typical zombie movie, right? Wrong. Classic comedy with Bruce Campbell and Sam Raimi at their finest. I show this to people against their will, and they thank me for it.

8) THE ABYSS: SPECIAL EDITION: People walked out of the Abyss scratching their heads saying “What was the point?” – Well, the point is in the 40 minutes of cut footage.. watch the Sec. Ed, and suddently the movie takes on an entirely different, and better tone.

9) THE HOWARD STERN SHOW: Yup. He’s crass, and sometimes asks women to take off their tops. BUT.. more often its a frank, funny, soap opera that follows the lives of the cast. When its good (see: Artie’s blowup) its worth buying a Sirius subscription for.

10) BARENAKED LADIES: Their fans are rampant, but to most, they are the “One Week” band. That is not their only, or best song. Not every album is perfect, but there are gems like “Born On a Pirate Ship” and “Everything to Everyone” that REALLY shine.. and “Gordon”, their first album back in 1988, is Seargeant Pepper’s Good.

(EXTRA CREDIT: The Beatles: People think they don’t like them based on their early work, and when they hear the later stuff, they change their tune.. Do NOT underestimate this band. they’re themost respected for a reason.)

Between prep work for an upcoming conference, overtime at work, and general satisfaction with my lot in life, I have little to blog about right now. But I’m alive 🙂

As most of you probably weren’t aware, this week I went to Motorcycle Safety Training at Murray High School in Salt Lake City, UT.

On the recommendation of a co-worker, I signed up for the $180, three-day motorcycle course: one Wednesday evening from 6PM to 9PM, all day Saturday, and all day Sunday. “All Day” really means from 7:45 AM until some time between 2PM and 4PM. I had some misgivings about if I actually needed the course — after all, I’ve been riding for several months on my learner’s permit without incident — but wanted to get my waiver without having to book time with the tester at the Driver License Division of the Utah Highway Patrol.

If you’ve ever been to a Utah DLD, you know why I want to avoid that particular bureaucracy as much as possible. It’s simply an excruciating wait to get anything done.

So I showed up to the Wednesday class on my bike. I needed to take one U-turn on the way, and this reminded me why the class would be a good idea: I was having a lot of trouble finishing my U-turn in a reasonable amount of space. I thought perhaps it was simply the size of my bike. After all, it’s a big 1100CC.

Anyway, Wednesday classroom time focused on keeping your bike maintained, the benefits of riding, and managing risk. It was quite boring, actually, and I was worried that if this was all there was, it might have been a waste of my money.

Saturday dawned rainy and cold. I drove the car to the high school. This was our first “range day”. The first half of the day would be spent outdoors on the motorcycle, getting acquainted with the controls and learning the very basics. Since I arrived early, I got first pick of the bike. I could pick one of a Suzuki GZ250 (I think it’s called an S30 now), Honda Rebel 250, or the one Kawaski Ninja 250.

I have fond memories of friends having Ninjas in high school, so I picked that one. It’s a very serviceable beginner bike, and it hauled around my 230+lb butt just fine. It was also the only bike in the class easily capable of greater than 75MPH at our altitude (4200 feet), which would be a good bonus for anybody else from Utah who’s looking for a starter bike.

Since I had already ridden for a few months, at the start of the class I was quite bored. However, I learned that I had a few bad habits that I needed to address, such as only braking with one brake or the other, rather than using both brakes all the time. As I began working on those, the range class became more interesting.

By the end of the time practicing on the range, I was soaked to the bone despite my rain gear, and very sore, particularly in my left “clutch” hand. We spent a few more hours in class discussing how to maneuver the bike safely in traffic and around hazards.

The third day of class, Sunday, also dawned rainy, but much colder than Saturday. This was to be an all-range, all-day class.

Utah’s motorcycle licensing is tiered into three categories, and what you take your test on dictates what you’re allowed to ride. The three tiers are “-250cc”, “-650cc”, and “+650cc”. I rode my 1100CC Honda V65 Sabre to class, despite the driving rain, in hopes that I could take my riding test on it. However, the instructors said I would first have to pass the -650cc test on the Ninja 250cc bike, and after I passed that, if they had time, interest, and the weather was OK, they’d test me on my bigger bike. Otherwise, I’d just have to pay my $15 and come back another day, or else schedule a regular exam at the Driver License Division on my bigger bike.

This range day was MUCH more interesting. We practiced everything covered in the Motorcycle Test: panic stops, swerving to avoid a collision, the offset cone weave, clean entry and exit from a turn, evaluating turn speeds, etc. A focus was kept on keeping your speed up during many maneuvers, because attempting to perform them at too low a speed might lead to dropping your bike.

After hours of practice, my hands, shoulders, and legs were quite sore. It’s far more physically demanding to wrestle around a motorbike at low speed than to drive a car. Finally it arrived:

Exam Time.

The skills evaluation was actually really straightforward. Everybody in our class passed except “Scooter Lady”, so named because she had ridden the day before on her 90cc scooter. She didn’t bother showing up for the second day on the range. Perhaps she assumed, incorrectly, it would be called on account of the constant, steady rain.

By the end of the exam, the sun came out and it started warming up. I got my -650cc endorsement card, then Twila (one of the instructors) told me to go warm up my big bike. She let me dry-run through all the tests several times on the bigger bike.

I had to score 20 points or fewer to pass. Final score on the 250cc Ninja: 8 points. Final score on the 1100CC V65: 1 point, given only because I went one foot past the stop-line on the panic-stop test.

The bike weighs twice as much as the little bikes. You’d think that would be taken into account.

Well, regardless, I’m going to go back and spend several hours in Hell — I mean, the DLD — tomorrow to get my new driver’s license with full endorsement.

I just hope they don’t insist on me taking another riding exam.

Hey all.. still toiling away on the flick. I wanted to share with you a side endeavor I am executive producing.

www.suckcast.com

It is a podcast that is movie-based, but really, is just a funny, crass, ridiculous 30 mins. Please check it out. I came up with the name, concept, and I cast it.. but its these 2 hilarious guys that make it worthwhile..

WARNING: Not for the kiddies.. f-bombs galore.

A broadcast from two years ago talking about the looming recession. If we’re not in one now, then economists don’t know what a recession is. Schiff totally nailed the current economic climate. Does he have a newsletter?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IU6PamCQ6zw

Found a superb piece on CNN outlining why trying to “talk things out” with your husband can be a really bad idea, and make your relationship take a nose-dive: http://www.cnn.com/2008/LIVING/personal/09/26/o.improve.your.marriage/index.html

John LaBruzzo recently proposed that low-income women be given $1000 if they are willing to have themselves sterilized, and a tax-incentive program to encourage college-educated people to have more children.

I see a few sides to this.

From a statistical perspective, LaBruzzo may be on to something. The highly-controversial conclusion made by the Freakonomics authors that the Roe V. Wade decision had a profound impact on US crime statistics supports this outlook. If fewer babies are born into high-risk environments, there will be fewer demonstrating behaviors that are a result of that high-risk environment.

From a common-sense perspective, I have to say “WTF are you doing proposing a law like that?” It’s unethical and immoral to target a specific socioeconomic group for cleansing from the gene pool. Personally, I think I’d oppose this measure on these grounds alone. We’re not offering more choices to people this way; we’re taking choice away from them for the prospect of a quick buck.

From an evolutionary perspective, my principal worry is much more about what modern medicine can do to cause people to reproduce who otherwise would have died before reproduction. I see a future in which humanity requires medicine and surgery to simply survive due to propagation of genes which were inhibited under millions of years of selective pressure. I believe the solution will be widespread gene selection, though, not sterilization-based eugenics.

What do you think?

It turns out we didn’t have President Gore in 2000 by only 269 votes:

https://www.msu.edu/~sheppa28/elections.html

In a country of 300 million people, that’s certainly a squeaker. It also makes it the Presidential vote with the smallest total number of popular vote differences between winner and loser in history.

What if we’d had President Gore? Well, I predict that 9/11 would have still happened, we’d never have invaded Iraq, but we’d still be suffering through the greatest financial crisis since the Great Depression. Possibly exacerbated because the capital-gains tax would have remained at 20-25% rather than being reduced to 15%, resulting in more pressure to perform for hedge fund managers, real estate loan officers, and insurance salesmen.

For those of you, like me, who have been somewhat mystified about the series of financial bailouts that don’t really appear to be stopping the financial giants from toppling, read: http://news.goldseek.com/GoldSeek/1221672153.php

This came into my inbox today. I thought I would share it, but not in the way my fellow American apparently intended. It’s not a sober commentary on how much money $85Bn is. It’s more of a commentary on American math skills. Can you spot the problem?

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I’m against the $85,000,000,000.00 bailout of AIG.

Instead, I’m in favor of giving $85,000,000,000 to America in

a We Deserve It Dividend.

To make the math simple, let’s assume there are 200,000,000

bonafide U.S. Citizens 18+.

Our population is about 301,000,000 +/- counting every man, woman

and child. So 200,000,000 might be a fair stab at adults 18 and up..

So divide 200 million adults 18+ into $85 billon that equals $425,000.00.

My plan is to give $425,000 to every person 18+ as a

We Deserve It Dividend.

Of course, it would NOT be tax free.

So let’s assume a tax rate of 30%.

Every individual 18+ has to pay $127,500.00 in taxes.

That sends $25,500,000,000 right back to Uncle Sam.

But it means that every adult 18+ has $297,500.00 in their pocket.

A husband and wife has $595,000.00.

What would you do with $297,500.00 to $595,000.00 in your family?

Pay off your mortgage – housing crisis solved.

Repay college loans – what a great boost to new grads

Put away money for college – it’ll be there

Save in a bank – create money to loan to entrepreneurs.

Buy a new car – create jobs

Invest in the market – capital drives growth

Pay for your parent’s medical insurance – health care improves

Enable Deadbeat Dads to come clean – or else

Remember this is for every adult U S Citizen 18+ including the folks

who lost their jobs at Lehman Brothers and every other company

that is cutting back. And of course, for those serving in our Armed Forces.

If we’re going to re-distribute wealth let’s really do it…instead of trickling out

a puny $1000.00 ( “vote buy” ) economic incentive that is being proposed by one of our candidates for President.

If we’re going to do an $85 billion bailout, let’s bail out every adult U S Citizen 18+!

As for AIG – liquidate it.

Sell off its parts.

Let American General go back to being American General.

Sell off the real estate.

Let the private sector bargain hunters cut it up and clean it up.

Here’s my rationale. We deserve it and AIG doesn’t.

Sure it’s a crazy idea that can “never work.”

But can you imagine the Coast-To-Coast Block Party!

How do you spell Economic Boom?

I trust my fellow adult Americans to know how to use the $85 Billion

We Deserve It Dividend more than I do the geniuses at AIG or in Washington DC.

And remember, The Birk plan only really costs $59.5 Billion because $25.5 Billion is returned

instantly in taxes to Uncle Sam.

Ahhh…I feel so much better getting that off my chest.

Birk T. J. Birkenmeier, A Creative Guy & Citizen of the Republic ; PS: Feel free to pass this along to your pals as it’s either good for a laugh or a tear or a very sobering thought on how to best use $85 Billion!!