Barnson.org

So our company sprung and purchased IT a copy of VMWare Infrastructure Foundation so we can get on the virtualization bandwagon. The VI Server software fairly rocks. Setting it up is a breeze, networking is all virtualized, and setting up virtual servers is a piece of cake.

The idea is to set up a new accounting timesheet server and Exchange test server on the VMWare boxes. The accounting timesheet server will be easy. However, Exchange might be a bear. So I look up the requirements: There must be a Windows 2003 SP1 domain contoller somewhere for Exchange to muck up with it’s schema changes and such.

We have such a server, but it’s in out Dayton, OH office. Everything else is a Windows 2000 DC. Not good to have your Exchange server talking to a remote DC over a DSL link, so the plan is to install a DC here at the local office. Normally that would involve new hardware and software, and you gotta justify it and order it and have it shipped and install it in the rack and hook it up and install the software.

That’s why VMWare rocks. I download the 2008 install iso from Microsoft, create a new virtual machine, configure it to be a 2008 server, virtually attach the CD-Drive to the iso, configure the vm to boot to the iso, and away we go. No hardware, no justifications, just make sure you have a license!

I set up a Server 2008 core vm in a matter of minutes. It’s sweet.

So I wanted to make my new Server 2008 a domain controller. TO do that, you have to run some preparation scripts against your existing Active Directory domain to prepare it to have a Windows 2008 server join. There were some snafus there due to some experimentation with MS Services for Unix and AD4Unix back in the day (note: do NOT extend your AD schema unless you absolutely have to and know what you’re doing), but they were fairly easy to work out.

Another note: I decided to go with Windows Server 2008 core, which is MS’ way of being all Unixsy by neglecting a GUI and making all configuration done via command prompt (although some programs still pop up a dialog box when looking at the help…huh?). So I had to find a reference on the command-line commands to do things like set up the networking, change computer name, join a domain, etc. Luckily, they have this nice thing called the internet with a fancy search interface called Google which finds me anything I could possibly want, provided I know how to ask (and please just ain’t the answer sometimes 😉

So Google enlightened me how to make my spiffy virtual Windows Server 2008 Core machine a domain contoller (hint: DCPromo and an answer file stripped down from an unattend.txt file).

Now to be a domain controller in an Active Directory environment, you must also be a DNS Server. Again, Google was the way and the truth and the light by finding me the OCSetup command, which adds “roles” to a Server 2008 installation. Wanna be a DNS server? BAM! Wanna be a DHCP server? WHAM!

Now here’s where the fun begins. I figured I could continue my command-prompt configuration education, but sometimes life is short and you just wanna use a damn GUI. Microsoft has traditionally offered AdminPaks for the client OS to manage MS server OSes. Google showed me that Microsoft thought RSAT would be a better name (Remote System Administration Tools). Of course, MS also though that it would be awesome to only have the remote admin tools for Server 2008 run on Vista w/SP1.

Luckily, I have me a Vista machine I’m testing out right here to my left. Alas, after downloading the RSATPak, it tells me this update is not for my machine. A lil’ bit or research (log files this time, not Google) tells me my machine doesn’t have SP1 installed.

Since Vista’s SP1 came out ages and eons ago, I wonder why my machine didn’t install it.

The first place to check is our WSUS 3.0 SP1 machine. I look, and it has downloaded Vista’s SP1 (and is even impatiently waiting for me to approve the EULA for XP SP3.) So it’s not the WSUS machine’s fault.

Back to my machine to look at the WindowsUpdate.log file. I find that it seems the updates, and it likes the updates, but some regulation is denying it from downloading the updates.

I swear to GodAllahYahwehBuddahHughHeffner! The error is: Update X us “PerUpdate” regulated and can NOT be downloaded.

So Google came up with some answers to this one, but I though that the first step would be to download Vista SP1 (tardily) and install it, to see if it would help.

Cause then with Vista SP1, I can install the RSAT. So I can be lazy and configure the DNS of my new virtual 2008 core server via a GUI So I can make sure it’s ready to interface with my new Exchange 2007 test server. And I still need to go back and make sure Vista SP1 fixes my Automatic Download problems on Vista…

And this doesn’t take into account the loads of other stuff I need to be doing. The joy of being IT at a small company is that I get to learn all kinds of new things and play with lots of new toys.

The bad thing about being IT at a small company is that I have to learn all kinds of new things across many different technologies. Alongside my computer and network IT duties, I am also Lord and Master of a vintage 1990’s era Nortel Modular ICS system, the alarm system for the building, the card access system, a third-party accounting system based on VB apps written around a COBOL database, and a fleet of new Crackberries used by people who reside at remote offices (and I don’t even have a Crackberry!).

Luckily I have my idiot savant relationship with anything IT, so I can figure it out. I don’t know why I get it, I just get it. KMart sucks…

My $.02 Weed

So today, for the first time, I heard the term “muffin top”. I am turning into an old man, I guess. From Urban Dictionary:

muffin top 1013 up, 179 down

Muffin-Top is a word used to describe the strange and bizarre waist scrunching effect that results when females wear tight fitting, low-rise/hip-hugger pants along with small-sized, navel exposing, mid-riff tops.

Though, the effect is more extreme with heavier females, all females, with the exception of anorexic models, can fall victim to the muffin-top disaster. The reason for this, is that the design of low-rise/hip-hugger pants, originally popular during the late 60’s and early-to-mid 70’s, defies the natural shape and contours of the average females’ body; forcing the skin and fat around her waist, back and upper buttocks to spill out over her pants and through her tiny crop-top, causing a muffin-top effect.

Originally, the idea behind low-rise pants and mid-riff tops, which made their first reappearance during the mid-to-late 90’s, was to produce clothing that would make a woman’s torso appear longer, and possibly thinner, than it actually was. Normally, men’s pants are designed with lower waists, because of their naturally longer torsos, narrower hips and smaller pelvises. In order to recreate this “longer, thinner torso” appearance for women, clothing manufacturers adopted shorter-waist, men’s trousers, modified the design for the female market, resulting in the catastrophe that the word, “muffin-top” currently describes. The muffin-top’s legacy, if anything, describes the disaster that can result when the fashion industry goes terribly wrong. The existence of muffin-tops is currently quite common, which is a testament to the fact that women will buy and wear anything, regardless of how vulgar and ridiculous it looks, as long as it is popular.

Wow, look at that muffin top! tags whale-tail low-rise low-rider hip-hugger chucha by Mr. Cheesy Cheeseville Jul 15, 2006 email it

This term was used to describe a late-night guard at our disaster-recovery site. I instantly recognized what he was describing when my co-worker said of the guard, “She likes to wear really skanky clothes with lots of leather, and it kind of grossed me out because she had a big muffin top below her halter.”

Never heard the slang term before, knew what it meant the moment I heard it. Now that is a useful phrase!

is Iron Man really as far into fiction as we think it is? http://uk.news.yahoo.com/rtrs/20080515/video/vwl-reuters-quickcut-flying-man-d7f4ae7.html Boy, that looks like an awful lot of fun!

Came across a post on RationalResponders about How To Irritate An Atheist. Here are some of my favorites, that actually work really well on me if you’d like to drive me nuts:

15) Say that seperation of church and state isn’t in the Constitution; insist that the Constitution is based on the Ten Commandments.

37) Explain that the lack of proof doesn’t mean it didn’t happen.

38) …and give him a blank look when he says that all people tried for a crime would go to jail.

39) Blame absolutely everything wrong in society on evolution.

44) Accuse him of being an agnostic, since he isn’t 100% positive that God does not exist.

59) No matter what he quotes from the Bible, say that it’s out of context.

60) …and when he points out that the quotes are in correct context, tell him you need to be a Christian to understand the true meaning of the Bible.

61) Tell him you must study the Bible for many years to reject Christianity.

62) …and when he points out that you reject Islam despite never having studied the Qu’ran, say that you have faith, and faith is all you need.

82) Smile smugly and tell him that there are no atheists in foxholes.

89) Equivocate scientific faith with religious faith, and conclude that, metaphysically, you are both in the same boat.

105) When he takes the time and trouble to explain where your analogy or interpretation is at fault, begin your response with a sigh, so he’ll know how patient you’re being.

120) Claim that Einstein was a Christian.

121) Claim that Darwin recanted evolution on his deathbed.

123) Vehemently claim that the theory of evolution is incompatible with theism, then turn around and blame the theory for promoting atheism.

125) Tell him it’s his responsibility to prove that God doesn’t exist.

129) Ask what he believes in, if not God.

130) …then tell him that nonbelief is also a worldview, therefore there is no such thing as an atheist and Christianity is true.

148) Tell him that Hitler was an atheist. (–MattNote: Hitler was Catholic–)

156) Argue the most insignificant point you can think of; when he doesn’t address your pettiness, claim victory.

157) Constantly attempt to equate atheism with theism.

172) For Muslims only: Say that it’s perfectly reasonable for anyone to convert to your religion, but no one has a valid reason to leave Islam; it is the [most] perfect religion. (–MattNote: this applies equally to a religion of which I used to be a member…)

185) Insist that Thomas Jefferson was a Christian.

226) Tell him he has to believe before he can understand the evidence.

244) Grossly misunderstand the word “theory.”

269) When the subject of homosexuality comes up, say “God created Adam and Eve, not Adam and Steve.”

275) Reply to every statement he makes, “That’s only your opinion.”

279) Point to something in nature that’s really cool, and call it proof of God’s existence.

284) Take advantage of a horrible national tragedy, caused in large part by religious fanaticism, by pushing your own religious fanaticism as the only thing that will save us all.

285) …and announce that the tragedy only happened because of those who ignore your religious fanaticism.

281) When ending your conversation with the atheist, promise to read whatever book the atheist may have mentioned, knowing darned well that you yourself never made it through Leviticus. (–MattNote: Yep, did this with a Christian friend, we exchanged Behe’s “Darwin’s Black Box” for Sagan’s “Demon-Haunted World”. I asked him if he’d read the book he loaned me yet, and he hadn’t. Several months later, we exchanged books again… and he hadn’t read the Carl Sagan book at all, yet I’d read Behe’s work and highlighted a bunch of passages. Dunno if I want to repeat that mistake.–)

All-told, a great post that I thoroughly enjoyed reading.

I transferred registrars from Register.com — whom I’ve been a customer of for 10 years — to Godaddy.com. Still waiting on it to come through, so at some unknown time, my site will go down for at least a few hours until I bring up the new records.

So after watching tonight, my list of movies made much better by Rifftrax™ has increased by one! Star Trek V has been on the list for a year — that movie is hilarious when you watch it with RiffTrax™ — and now I must add Eragon to the list.

Favorite line: “Wait, wait, wait for it… pull my finger!”

Highly recommended. If you’ve never before watched a movie with RiffTrax™, these two are, in my humble opinion, the best places to start. Eragon had us in stitches for two hours straight watching the sad excuse for a movie adaptation of the really quite-decent book.

Well, OK, the book is actually quite a bit cheesy in ripping off from other books and movies in the genre, but the movie appears as if they ripped out all the non-cheesy parts from the book, condensed the remainder for time, added an extra heaping helping of stinky cheese, and then shoveled Lord of the Rings-like melodrama and massive battle scenes with scores of corpses, blood, and fabulous gold lamé battle costumes and overweight men dressed like Orcs — er, I mean, Urguls — to attract the key eight-to-fourteen-year-old element that so loved the book.

Umm, but one suggestion: The ending, with Disembaudio singing all the way through the credits? Yeah, much like Oh Holy Crap of yesteryear, it’s only funny because it’s so awful, and nothing else happens for the rest of the RiffTrack. Enjoy!

Friday Morning, 9:30 AM. Our weekly interdepartmental meeting:

VANESSA THE ENTERTAINMENT DIRECTOR: All right, so that wraps up marketing, production, costuming, and the equine department. Before we close, let’s open for Round Table. Does anyone have anything they’d like to bring up?

JOHN: Actually, I would like to announce that last night I actually rolled *three*, yes three, natural 20s *in a row.*

((dead silence))

WES: Holy @(#$. Really?

JOHN: Yes.

ROWAN: Oh my God. Dude… well done, sir.

KEVIN: What are the odds of that?

((quick calculator work))

JOHN: .025%?

KEVIN: What is that, 1 in 400,000?

What followed was then a discussion of the exact damage multipliers that were involved because of said natural 20s (x9), which when coupled with the weapon type (axe) and strength bonuses already in effect (+10), meant that John did 189 damage in one blow on the night of Thursday, May the 8th, 2008.

And this was genuinely important enough to be discussed in our staff meeting.

I… simply don’t know what to say. How can he assume such vile things about the video-gaming community?

http://blog.wired.com/games/2008/04/jack-thompson-p.html

The juicy quotes from this letter from Jack to Strauss Zelnick, the producer for Grand Theft Auto IV. Jack has been prohibited by the court from contacting Take Two directly, so sent it to Zelnick’s lawyer…

Dear Mrs. Zelnick:

Your son, as you may know (or maybe you don’t know), is Chairman of Take-Two Interactive Software, Inc., whose most popular video games are the Grand Theft Auto murder simulator games banned in some countries but sold to children here…

…Experts note that the recent plethora of cop killings is caused in part by your darling son’s entrepreneurial energy. There are three policemen dead in Alabama because of Grand Theft Auto…

…Is there a Ted Bundy merit badge? If so, your loving son deserves one now…

…Maybe you, Mrs. Zelnick, were so taken by your handsome son that you spared the rod and spoiled the child. That would explain why he has brought you, by the way he presently acts, “to shame.”…

…Your son, this very moment, is doing everything he possibly can to sell as many copies of GTA IV to teen boys in the United States, a country in which your son claims you raised him to be “a Boy Scout.” More like the Hitler Youth, I would say…

This man is sociopathic. Write a letter to the mother of a computer game developer, blaming her for the murder of cops in Alabama?

Shame on you, Jack. Grand Theft Auto IV may be violent, bloody, and not something a socially responsible parent wants their child to play, but you made it personal.

Added a Twitter block to the right-hand side of my page. I hop on a couple of days a week, do a half-dozen mad updates, and then do something else. I think maybe if it’s on my blog, I’ll remember to update it more regularly.

I dig the brief-social-networking aspect of Twitter. No more than 140 characters means you must be succinct.

Ring, Ring.

“This is Matthew.”

“Hi, Honey, it’s Christy.”

“Hey, babe, how are you doing this morning?”

“Well, the Federal Express man just came and brought two shiny new boxes from Apple.”

“Our iPhones came?”

“Our iPhones came.”

“Will you please take them out and plug them in so they are fully-charged by the time I get home tonight? That way we can activate them right away.”

“I won’t be home tonight, I’ll be out with a friend.”

“So sad for you.”

“But I’m looking forward to my new iPhone!”

“So am I. OK, I’ll see you tonight, love.”

Got off phone. Did happy dance. Co-workers universally told me I suck because I have an iPhone and they don’t. Didn’t care.