I ran across a blog at Weary Man which reminds me of me:
The one that really hit home for me was the description of “the Trader and The Businessman”, which aptly describes almost every CTO or CIO I’ve worked for…
This is a more broadly defined group set, as several aspects of this type of moron intermingle with each other in such a way as to defy a more narrowly defined catagory. The primary defining factor of both groups can be summed up in one word. Arrogance. Arrogance with a capital ‘A’ written in 104 point type in a very bold font.
Ironically, they are among the more technically astute of the Moron classes. Their failing comes in the form of their belief that they can do no wrong and that their issue must be the most important in the world because it affects their business. Wether that be their online stock trading business, or their VPN to the office, or their e-mail access. They want it fixed and they want it fixed now. Nevermind that there is a hurricane/earthquake/snowstorm related outage that’s affecting ten thousand other people in the city/county/state. Nevermind the fact that if it really was that important, maybe they should have invested in a backup ISP connection. They want you to fix it now because the fate of their entire business and financial future rests on getting connected RIGHT NOW!
And you better get it fixed bub, or they will ream you and your company a new one with phrases such as; “If I ran my business this way, I’d be out of business in a week!” and “Do you think that’s good customer service?” and my personal favorite, “That is unacceptable!”.
Dealing with this group is probably the most difficult of all of the Moron groups. The Trader/Businessman’s own sense of self-importance makes them much more difficult to work with. Largely because they don’t want you to work with them, they want you to work for them. To a Trader/Businessman, every support person they talk with is just an extension of their own workforce. A workforce extension they can treat as poorly as they want because there are no HR concerns to deal with afterwards.
There really isn’t any single best way to deal with this Moron group. I have found that trying to relate to them in a business sense sometimes helps. Throwing around business jargon when appropriate helps put them at ease and can sometimes defuse what is almost always an explosive situation.
Ultimately, making sure there is a Supervisor available to hand them off to is usually the best policy, since thay will frequently be unsatisfied with anything you do if you cannot get them fixed immediately. If you are able to somehow satisfy, even partially, the Trader/Businessman when you are unable to really fix their issue, pat yourself on the back. You have accomplished a truly impressive feat of Technical Support prowess.