My life is weird.

In the last seven days I have…

1) Literally saved a dude from dying.
2) Pretended to be Woody from Toy Story for the President of Hair Cuttery.
3) Had a baby pee on my feet.
4) Pretended to murder 72 people, and got praised for it
5) Yelled at my sister and had her tell me I did a good job at it
6) Saw my face on the cover of a commercially released DVD
7) Written a rap about Santa Claus and Angelina Jolie

In the last seven days I have…

1) Literally saved a dude from dying. 2) Pretended to be Woody from Toy Story for the President of Hair Cuttery. 3) Had a baby pee on my feet. 4) Pretended to murder 72 people, and got praised for it 5) Yelled at my sister and had her tell me I did a good job at it 6) Saw my face on the cover of a commercially released DVD 7) Written a rap about Santa Claus and Angelina Jolie 8) Put makeup on other men 9) Helped my wife color her hair

and

10) (how white trash is this) Ate instant Mac N Cheese with Red wine at 3am

My life is really strange.

One thought on “My life is weird.”

  1. In the last seven days I have…

    In the last seven days, I have:

    • Rotated approximately five hundred tapes and shipped them to a secure off-site storage facility.
    • Scanned my hand at palm readers more than a hundred times.
    • Gone to the library and checked out three books, finished reading one of them, and returned the other two because they were boring.
    • Discovered that although I like Guinness Draft, I’m not such a fan of Guinness Extra Stout.
    • Read the first few chapters of “Leven Thumps and the Eyes of the Want”.
    • Recorded, tweaked, and uploaded the Exmormon Foundation conference.
    • Had a combined total of less than twenty hours of sleep.
    • Began writing the lyrics to first two songs which are going to go on my “Twelve Year Experiment” album.
    • Talked to my wife for three hours straight, late at night. It reminded me why I like her so much, and that when we’re together we usually do actually talk a lot and have to catch up when we’re apart for a few days.
    • Was summoned to the hospital thinking my stepfather was about to die, but found that his condition is just steadily getting worse.

    I think you win! My life isn’t all that weird right now.

    —
    Matthew P. Barnson

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