Well, ladies and gentlemen, the “other summer” has begun with two huge releases this weekend, and there is no end in sight.
Since last wednesday, “The Martix Revolutions” has kung-fu philosophized its way to north of 80 million dollars (domestic), and Will Ferrell’s “Elf” has charmed its way to over 30 million in two fewer days. IT HAS BEGUN!!!
So, to honor my new favorite Movie season, I present to you, in order, the notable releases from here until New years.. And whether you should see them.
THE MATRIX REVOLUTIONS: (out now) Saw it, and it was fine. Parts of it (almost 80%) were actually really really cool, but it suffers from being too big for its britches, bad dialogue, and.. well, I don’t want to give anything away. Better than Reloaded to be sure, but still, compared to the original, its a bit of a stinker. Still, I’d see it.
ELF: (out now) Will Farrell is a human raised by Christmas elves. Saw it, and it is the best Christmas movie in a decade. Our kids will be watching this in years to come.. see it on the big screen for great family fun. See it, see it, see it.
LOONEY TUNES: (11/14) Back in ACTION: Bugs Bunny and Brendan Fraser. Early reviews on this one are terrible.. someone close to the production has said it makes Space jam look like Shindlers List. Skip it.
MASTER AND COMMANDER: (11/14) Russell Crowe, check. Awesome book, check. Looks promising, but our expectations for seafaring movies has been raised so high after Pirates, it may be hard to live up to. I’ll probably see it.
THE MISSING: (11/19) Kate Blanchett (Galadriel in LOTR) has a missing little girl and Indian Tommy lee Jones has to help her. hot off his Oscar win, Ron Howard Directs.. and he did a good job of the missing kid thing in RANSOM, so I’ll probably check this one out.
CAT IN THE HAT: (11/21) Reviews are mixed, but the trailer makes it seem bloated and overdone, kind of like the Grinch. That being said, I like Mike Myers, and I kind of like parts of the Grinch. Proceed with caution, but it may be worth a look. I’ll see it, maybe.
GOTHIKA: (11/21) Halle Berry in a supernatural thriller.. or is it a psychological thriller.. that’s the mystery. Reviews are excellent, so my own distaste for Ms. Berry’s ruining Bond and the first XMEN notwithstanding, it may be worth a looksee. But not for me.
BAD SANTA: (11/26) Billy bob Thorton is a mall santa.. but the reviews have been middling and the best stuff from the previews is just a footnote in the already exceptional ELF. It is also less family friendly. I’d just see Elf.. even if it is for the second time.
HAUNTED MANSION: (11/26) My fave disney ride on the big screen. And after the success of Pirates, I have high hopes. Reviews have been mixed, though, and the trailer makes it look okay. Problem is Eddie Murphy, who is 50/50 on making really good family movies (Doolittle) and really bad ones (Klumps). But, rest assured I’ll be there.
TIMELINE: (11/26) The book was great, and it explores my favorite idea.. modern guys go back in time and fight against medeival guys. Conneticut yankee with punch and braveheart battles. I am so there.. Haunted Mansion/ Timeline double feature.
HONEY: (12/5)Jessica Alba (Dark Angel) dance movie. Nobody will be there, neither will I. Reviews are mixed/negative, and the trailer is boring. How fun could a movie with a trailer this boring be. Skip it.
THE LAST SAMURAI: (12/5)Tom Cruise as an American who becomes ingrained in Japanese Bushido society. And lots of Samurai epic battles. Reviews are good, and the preview is just awesome. I will forgive that time Tom Cruise was rude to me, and I will be sitting in the theatre for this one.
LOTR: RETURN OF THE KING: (12/17) Heeere we go. All early reports is that this puppy is better than the two before. Its darker, more serious, but also more emotionally engaging. I have already set up 3 seperate get togethers about this movie. I will be there again and again and again. You should be too.
MONA LISA SMILE: Well, I will be tehre for this, but not by choice. It is, of course, Julia Roberts as a teacher. Yeah, the early reviews are okay, but rweally, this is just to make my wife happy. I have liked about 2/3 of what Roberts has put out recently well enough. I’d just as soon see an ELF LOTR double feature.
PAYCHECK: (12/25) Ben Affleck in a memory erasing thriller. I’ll probably want my memory erased if I see it. Maybe on video.
PETER PAN: (12/25) A big live action Peter Pan. Well.. not for me. it seems gratuitous. I liked the cartoon. I liked HOOK. I don’t need this story visited again. Consider it skipped.
CHEAPER BY THE DOZEN: (12/25) Well, the trailer is funny enough.. the cast is fresh.. Steve Martin and the WB crowd. Perhaps, but by then, movies I haven’t even heard of will be sweeping the nation for Oscar consideration. (I hadn’t heard of Beautiful Mind until like 5 weeks before it came out.) It will probably be a renter.
Yes, I know, its a lot to see.. but that is part of the joy for me now.. the holiday movie season.. now.. What will YOU see?
Maybe ELF
Maybe we’ll catch ELF down on one of Jordan Commons’ huge, surround-screen, DTS theaters one afternoon while I’m unemployed. Sounds like a fun afternoon doing “dinner and a movie” with the kids. They have stadium-style seating, a balcony, and these really cool drinkholders that actually hold dinner trays from the surrounding restaurants. Eat dinner while you watch the movie on a fifty foot screen. Yummy.
Matrix Revolutions? I’d have to watch that by myself — my wife doesn’t do R movies, and prefers I don’t either. Probably a renter.
The others? We’ll probably pass, see what we can catch on video.
Except Return of the King. I’ll probably have seen that in theaters six times by February, at least one of them with my wife.
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Matthew P. Barnson