Nine days from today, the Most Dreaded Holiday arrives.
Yeah, that one.
The one most husbands and boyfriends learn to fear if they have been with their partners for more than a year.
St. Valentine’s Day.
The origin of this holiday seems fairly straightforward, according to legend. Claudius Caesar found that men were unwilling to enlist into the Roman legion around 496 A.D. because they did not wish to leave their wives and families. Claudius did the math, and figured out that if he forbade marriage for a few years, he’d have plenty of soldiers for his army. Valentine secretly married couples for quite some time before he was discovered and executed. The holiday takes place, probably not coincidentally, on the Roman day of the veneration of Juno, the goddess of women and marriage, February 14. Of course, I just gleaned that information from a few Google searches.
But enter next week. Some I’ve done the roses. I’ve done the jewelry. I’ve done the dates, dinners, roses, jewelry, deep massages, and even forgotten the holiday entirely a few years. I heard on the radio that there’s a zoo in Chicago (I think) where you can give your valentine the gift of their very own hissing cockroach, which they’ll have visitation rights with.
I’m not quite sure what to do for this Valentine’s day. I want to avoid being cheap, trite, etc. And to think that, if I live an average American lifespan, I’ll have another half-century to conjure up ideas.
What are your plans for this upcoming Valentine’s day?
V-Day
D and I are going on a double date with some good friends — a nice dinner and then we’re seeing Rufus Wainwright in concert at the Beacon Theater in NYC. She’s insisted on neither flowers nor candy – works for me!
(PS – thanks for the sig Matt!)
— Ben Schuman Mad, Mad Tenor
I figure…
I figure men are “entitled” to as much spoiling and fancy treatment as the women so I’m expecting at least a reciprical dose of syrup and sugar this year. Should I hold my breath till that happens?
Redundancy
The problem is, I ‘ve just had an anniversary, so its a little anticlimactic to have, two weeks later, a big romantic holiday. For the anniversary, I took her shopping, got her 2 dozen roses, chocolates (not yet finished), went to a play, and went to a japanese steakhouse for dinner.
SO.. here we are, two weeks later. I think the idea will be to do something small and intimate. A nice breakfast in bed, maybe, or going to her favorite pancake place, followed by maybe a day at home, just relaxing.. and I’ll try to pamper her alittle. I’ll do her half of the chores and let her watch a Julia Roberts movie or something like that.
Or perhaps we’ll just go oout somewhere simple.. a movie and a lunch, or a trip to Harper’s ferry of something. I think a good quiet day juxtaposes itself nicely.
Oh, and BTW, how do I get a signature?
redundant redundancy
The problem is, I ‘ve just had an anniversary, so its a little anticlimactic to have, two weeks later, a big romantic holiday. For the anniversary, I took her shopping, got her 2 dozen roses, chocolates (not yet finished), went to a play, and went to a japanese steakhouse for dinner.
SO.. here we are, two weeks later. I think the idea will be to do something small and intimate. A nice breakfast in bed, maybe, or going to her favorite pancake place, followed by maybe a day at home, just relaxing.. and I’ll try to pamper her alittle. I’ll do her half of the chores and let her watch a Julia Roberts movie or something like that.
Or perhaps we’ll just go oout somewhere simple.. a movie and a lunch, or a trip to Harper’s ferry of something. I think a good quiet day juxtaposes itself nicely.
Oh, and BTW, how do I get a signature?
Signatures
Signatures are easy — just check your account page under edit account on the right-hand side (under your username, “Timpane”).
—
Matthew P. Barnson
“Well, I’m Getting YOU Soemthing”
Sitting here with the girlriend in Sedona, AZ and we’re reading the thread together…
I said, “Honey, you don’t really want presents do you?”
BIG MISTAKE
She says, “Well, I’ve already bought your present for this Valentine’s Day plus the next 3,456 Valentine’s Days.”
**Pause**
I say, “Okay, so I should get you something then, right? So what do you want?”
BIG MISTAKE
She says, in the most icy sardonic tone possible, “Why don’t you just go out and get me chocolates and flowers.”
Then she let me know I’m not getting any for the next 2 years.
Sam Sam Sam
A rule of thumb: A woman always wants presents. Next rule of thumb: Even if the woman says she doesn’t want presents, see above rule.
I always get Amy something, even if it’s little or inexpensive. Then I say that either Caleb (our son) or her cat gave it too her. I haven’t bought the woman anything since her engagement ring 🙂
It’s also a good idea to hide her present, because even if it’s small, the adventure of looking for it gives you points. If the search requires planning, you get more points for having put thought into it.
Unless she’s dropped you a hint on the exact present she wants, all she’s looking for is the fact you put effort into getting her something. If she wants something specific, she should drop enough hints for you to figure it out.
My $.02
Male memory
And if you have classic male memory, along the lines of “What did we get my mother for her birthday this year?”, then be sure and write that stuff down. Sometimes the hints are few and far between, and it’s only in seeing it all written down coherently that you can figure it all out.
—
Matthew P. Barnson