You all can talk about intelligent design all you want; I’ve got larger issues to address. Such as: it has taken me a while to realize why I’ve been so disturbed by the sudden rise in popularity of I-Pods and the like. At least in DC, you can’t go ten feet on any sidewalk without seeing someone with that glassy look to their eyes, little wires dangling from their ears, paying just a little too much attention to the little white plastic box in their hand…
Then, while in Ann Arbor last weekend for a meeting, I caught ST:TNP, episode 106: The Game. A classic episode, featuring the indomitable Wesley Crusher fresh from the Academy, the lovely but out-of-her-element Ashley Judd in a career-challenging role – it’s no Best of Both Worlds, but then what is?
And it all became so clear, as I sat there watching this ep: Someone brought back an I-Pod from Risa, those aliens with that lame forehead ridge are just plumping us up for a quick takeover while we’re plugged into the latest podcast from someone-needs-a-life, and in the not-too-distant-future, we’ll be hoping Data comes through with that lame watch-the-birdie save before the top of the hour.
Not to offend any Barnsonian I-Pod worshippers, but the whole thing for me got pushed over the edge after spending a few moments in a college town this past weekend. In DC, we’ve got Blackberries and federal subpeonas (thrilling party conversation-starter by the way). But it seemed that Ann Arbor had been overrun by Apple and no one noticed. You could almost hear Steve Jobs cackling like Dr. Evil in the background.
In line at the largest Starbucks in North America (I mean it, you couldn’t see the far side of it), all over the bookstores, all over campus, in the three restaurants I ate at, at the hotel, and on and on. Seriously, someone needs to pull a Wesley on those things to determine if they aren’t hitting the pleasure center of the frontal lobe, because there was just a little too much love for the I-Pod there.
Isn’t silence golden to anyone anymore?
Just my two cents. It’s been one of those weeks so far.
Yet another step toward destruction
I’m not sure iPod’s devalue music, as Norman Lebrecht seems to think Walkman’s (and to a lesser extent iPod’s) did. But I have always suspected (in a flame-baiting sort of way) that an addiction to headphones is the result of finding yourself boring. (With due credit to serious musicians, whose unhindered thoughts would presumably turn to music anyway.)
Of course, I own and enjoy an iPod. I rarely listen to it alone with headphones, but the gratification of instantaneously accessing any one of my 3,500 songs is too much to pass up.
Want, don’t have…
I’ve often thought that I wanted an iPod. Then I realized that I would simply have another $300 device I rarely use. I can play back MP3s on my Palm, and never do. My Palm used to go with me everywhere I did, until my work got me a Blackberry.
Blackberries are like crack for email-addicted people. You really shouldn’t give them to techies.
—
Matthew P. Barnson
Still suffering withdrawal
The PR firm I was with for nearly two years paid for the monthly CrackBerry service, so I got hooked. I’d read it at night, in the dark, while in bed. I’d check it in traffic, I’d read it during dinner. When I left the firm (escaped, actually – think Wolfram & Hart), I had to go cold turkey. It was a dark period in my life – longing for that little chirp from the machine, hoping somehow that it would come back into my life.
Alas, it was not to be. And after a couple of years, the pain has mostly subsided. I don’t know if I’ll ever get over Macho Grande, or my BlackBerry addiction, but I think I’m better for having once been a user than not.
And I’m only mostly kidding about the Wolfram & Hart thing.
Wolfram and Hart
Heh.. got Kelly Wolfram and Hart mugs a couple weeks ago.
What if..
Sometimes on your Ipod, you listen to music you wrote.. That means I’m both too boring to listen to my thoughts, but interesting enough to listen to recorded..
http://www.timpane.com/mp3
But I digress.. TIM, have you tried hitting them with tiny little strobe lights?
Strobe Light Busted
I figured I would start with snarky, sarcastic blog posts and mocking comments to myself from the safety of my car. Then, work up to the strobes.
And, besides, my positronic network has been a little congested lately, so I’ve been slow to come up with the witty responses.
Hey..
Next time you go to the Ipod store, bring a Horgon (Oh lord, I’m a big fat nerd)
The Game!!!!
Sam & I have waxed poetic about that episode of ST:TNG forever! And it has nothing to do with ST:TNG and everything to do with Ashley Judd. My God she’s hot in that episode.
(OK, so you can stop that sentence after ‘hot’.)
I can guarantee that Sam can be on his honeymoon in some swank island resort with his beautiful wife, come across this blog, and comment on Ashley in that episode.
If anyone knows where one could “preview” that episode on all its video glory, I promise I wouldn’t use that information for any illegal or piratcy-related activities. Honest. Really. Swear to god!
Lefler’s Law #32: “If life hands you lemonade, don’t try to make lemons out of it.”
My $.02 Weed
To answer…
To answer the question of “What do Wil Wheaton and iPods have to do with each other?”, I present the following list of links regarding Wil Wheaton, the actor behind the notorious Wesley Crusher:
Yes, I have no life.
OK, actually, I’m a bit of a Wil Wheaton fan. Though I think his career as an actor has made a turn for the worse over the years, I dig him as a person, author, and blogger. And he likes Linux. That always scores someone a few points in my book.
—
Matthew P. Barnson
Interesting that I read this
Interesting that I read this just after I discovered the iPod’s newest addition to their gadgetry… you can now download TV shows from iTunes.
I’ve just watched the first four episodes of Lost back to back, have gotten totally hooked, and the only reason why I’m writing this now is because I’m waiting for the fifth one to download.
It’s not about the iPod… it’s about the iTunes, baby! I get the jones to hear a song, I go to my computer, and click-click BOOM I now have the song. No more travelling to the music store only to find out that they don’t have it because my tastes are far too eclectic.
What’s more, I can now download music without feeling the guilt of being a dirty little music pirate. I can now reserve that guilt for all the other forms of media I download.
Avast ye, maties!
Rowan out.
YES!!!!!
Tim, DUDE, you totally struck a nostalgic nerve. “The Game” episode is the best ST: TNG episode of all time. It’s great to see that there are those who can make such a fantastic allegory from a small, remnant of fantasy nostalgia to a social wave in the real, living universe. Kudos to your brilliance in realizing the connection.
Even better, as I was reading your post, I hapenned to be sitting on a remote island, similar to Risa, in which lots of people were dreamily wafting through their vacation with the thin white headphones plugged into their head. “Isn’t this great? What level are you on? I’m on Level 42.” (Coincidentally, Level 42 is one of the greatest unknown bands in the history of modern music.)
I feel that the i-Pod is a product consistent with Apple’s historical marketing proposition: buying our products at a relatively high price provides the consumer with increased social and reputational value that would not be attained if the consumer had bought alternative, cheaper products which would deliver the same functionality.
I made a post earlier this year in which I asked Barnsonians to recommend their favorite podcasts. Since then, I’ve become a podcast freak. I’m a devoted subscriber and listener to 20 unique podcasts. I download and listen each morning before I head off to the office. However, I don’t use an i-Pod to listen to the eponymous casts. The i-Pod is hardware. The i-Pod delivers the content. The i-Pod in delivering the content presents problems. Because it had a processor and spinning mechanical parts, the i-Pod can’t be used when working out in a gym. Because it runs on a degenerative battery, the i-Pod must be replaced in several years.
I bought a Creative MuVo TX for the Wife Unit. It has far less storage space than the i-Pod, but it has a USB to easily swap out songs from a computer station, it contains a radio, and the 2 AAA batteries give a listener 10 hours.
So Tim, in conclusion, I’m one of those seedy guys on Risa that’s providing a knock-off version of the game.